Turns Out All These Professors Are Not What They Seem, or Ignorance Is Everywhere!

It has come to our attention that certain tenured faculty members continue to address, to their non-tenured "colleagues," questions that they ought to be embarrassed to ask.

We hereby publish the answers.

Yes, students must complete the English core before they can take upper division courses. That's the definition of "core," after all, isn't it?

No, students ought not be advised to take Senior Seminar (the capstone course) until they have completed most of their other upper division credits. We not only wonder why a tenured faculty member would feel the need to ask this question, but we also wonder why he/she feels no shame at addressing such a question to someone whom they recently sought to keep from voting on curricular matters. For once and for all, if you fancy yourself our intellectual superiors, you should at least have the self-respect not to give the lie to your own claims by asking us questions to which you ought to know the answers. Ask someone else, surely, for God forbid you dispense incorrect information to students, but don't ask the very people whom you should wish will never see the truth about your ignorance.

The most amusing (and infuriating) aspect of this situation is that many of you have been teaching in the Department since Captain Howdy was still in high school, indeed, in some cases, since before Captain Howdy was even born!